Astana

Wakes up early because the window’s open and it’s cold in this town – too cold for more emotion than a thank you for a smoke or pity laugh at last week’s joke you haven’t told a million times by now but my, you’re getting close. And I should know – I tell you the Cossacks built a mighty fortress here. You are thinking of something else – your posture makes this clear but I go on with my narration – how the feared Gulags were stationed on the outskirts of the city, how some Soviet committee eating caviar in Moscow could have no idea how awful every second of this place is – where the cigarettes are tasteless in the cold. And you should know – you do still go to the cafe to charge your phone and I get drunk on oily vodka when you’re gone. It isn’t wrong to want to change every thing about your life – but it is long and hard and awkward all the same.

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~ by perfectionatrix on April 14, 2012.

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