Some Assembly Required

How to make a ghost: first, start with absence – stark removal from familiar patterns, friends replaced with drinks and powders, odd-hour naps, and week-long showers. Then you will notice the mirror much less, or the twitch in your wrist or the cut of her dress – let you alone be the why for your mess – let it be your fault that the faint hue of death has lately appeared in your curtains and corners. If she starts to get close, be certain to warn her she’ll never be what is the most important; never get close to the drip of endorphins (OH I miss my body – like when she used to want me. Now I feel sloppy and creepy and haunting the path to the porch won’t get me to you but it’s all I’ve remembered to do).

How to make a ghost: start with the most painful thing in your life and then give it up twice. Tell yourself, yes – she was very nice but there’s no way it’d ever – it’d never be right. Did you know nothing changes? That it never does? Did you know your arrangements are static because there is only the brief illusion of hope – and when that goes away, then you become a ghost.


~ by perfectionatrix on June 10, 2011.

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